5 Things I Learned by Taking a Step BACK

It’s not the money, it’s the freedom ✌️ isn’t that the saying? That stuck with me for a long time, not because I feel it in any special way but because I always LIKED to work. I liked to lead people and keep busy and be in charge of something. But when abe was 8 months old and I decided to become a stay at home mom after working for 7 years non stop, I had the unique opportunity to run my own fitness business from home, placed in my lap. It’s been an incredible journey, albeit challenging, for 2.5 years and I feel like the knowledge I’ve learned is priceless! But life HAPPENS, and things get swayed and overwhelming, so a few months ago when I felt like I was losing my grip I decided to take a small step back from everything I was doing day to day to keep the grind alive, and this is what I learned...

1. The world runs fine without me.  Turns out, I am not that special 🤷‍♀️ and that’s okay! Taking a step back from all my ‘responsibilities’ gave me a chance to see that things will not fall to pieces if I decide to leave those emails til later or maybe not send that message THIS SECOND. Things still rolled on, everyone still breathed and worked out and did their thing, man. Once I saw that, I had time to do.....nothing. I painted my nails, I played new games with Abel,  I even mindlessly scrolled without having guilt over ‘should be getting XYZ done’ ! I even got back into reading books other than personal development 🙏 (don’t get me wrong PD is the shiz and you definitely need it in your life) but I was so terribly missing my crime/murder/historical fiction novels! Anybody else into murderdeathkill books or am I crazy over here? 🙋‍♀️ I was doing absolutely nothing of what I ‘needed’ to do, and everything was... great. 
2. I wasn’t in love with my process. You ever heard that old saying—fall in love with the process and results come on their own? Okay, me too, and I THOUGHT it was totally me. Uh, WRONG. Taking a step back I realized how relaxed I was not having to worry about the inbox or the Instagram or the Facebook etc etc etc. I loved aspects of what I was doing, but I quickly realized that more aspects gave me anxiety and made me less likely to get things done. I LOVE social media and the way it’s become this giant marketplace where you can buy/sell/connect and generate income from anywhere—that’s why I STARTED an online business—but the grinding I was doing made me feel yucky and tired and I wasn’t getting anywhere nearly as fast as I knew I could. But FUN FACT—when I let go of my own expectations and just LIVED through my social media, the response in my mental state and my business was insane! Hint*people like real people. I wasn’t being ME because I felt overpoured and it was exhausting 🤷‍♀️
3. I wasn’t spending enough time with my son, and that one hurt. I’m a work from home mom, I thought there was no way I could spend MORE time with him—he is literally here all day. But what I didn’t realize was the amount of time I spent staring at my phone prepping calls and responding to emails and doing meal plans/workout plans, etc was EXTENSIVE. When I put down the phone and relaxed, it felt like I had a whole new kid! Our play hours were extended, we had new games and toys to bond over, and I had zero moments where I thought “we’ve got 15 more minutes of play time before I REALLY need to get this done!” As upset as I was to make this discovery, I am so grateful to be able to now know the impact it was having + to rectify it with as much pool time and movie nights as possible 💗
4. I remembered who I was deep down. I started my online biz before Abe was a year old. I had just quit my long term full time position as a kitchen manager at a company I had been with since I was 16. I worked my ass off to climb up the restaurant ladder(any other restaurant lifers in here? You know what I’m sayin’) and to leave it so suddenly was mentally challenging. From fast paced constantly moving on my feet 10-12+ hours a day to caring for this tiny human I created who just chilled (he was SUCH a good baby looking back) — UHHHH WHAT DO I DO WITH ALL THIS TIME?! Not to mention I was still carrying 30-ish pounds of baby weight and too cheap + lazy to go to the gym myself, so at home fitness programs I could do to get back in shape + a business I could build to keep my mind busy was perfect, and I’ve been working it ever since. 2.5 years later and finally coming up for air, I realize that fitness is my passion no doubt. Social media marketing is my gift. But the disconnect happened somewhere, and taking a step back from the business side and just having FUN with it I got to see a side of myself that I forgot was there. I like this me.
5. I found my happiness again. I say this not because I was UNhappy before, but because I didn’t realize that I could be HAPPIER. By taking a step back from the pressure I was putting on myself I created more time for Trevor and I, I became a more fun mom, and my business continues to grow if not better than it did before because I feel authentic again. I feel like ME coming through and connecting with people without a million tasks running in the back of my mind. What’s better, is more avenues have opened for me financially and I’ve been able to partner with some fantastic brands because I feel NEW and OPEN. I still have a lot that i want to do and explore but it is amazing what experiences show themselves to you when you’re not ‘too busy’ to give them a chance. 

So here I sit now, typing this out on my iPhone in bed, totally relaxed with zero rock solid deadlines to make. What’s more, is I feel EXCITED for tomorrow and what I’m going to do! I never have and never will give up on the business I set to create in 2015, but I’ve learned that I have so many ways to do what I love without it feeling like I’m bombarded with tasks and emails all day long. I get to be extensively creative again, I have opportunities to partner with amazing people, and I feel free to WRITE again—is that not the coolest thing?!   I mean if you look, it’s been a year or better since my last post 😳 Maybe tomorrow I’ll draw on the sidewalk with Abel, and snap some pictures. Maybe I’ll turn it into a sponsored post. Maybe I’ll blog about it, or vlog about it. I don’t know yet! BUT I know I’m excited to find out 🙏

Are you happy with how your life looks right now? Like, I mean REALLY happy—not just ‘things are good I should be appreciative life works like this’ happy? I hope so!! Do you need to shave things off your to-do list to make time to do YOU, or maybe, nothing at all? Then just DO IT! You cannot pour from an empty cup, sis. Take a step back, tell me what you learn about yourself 🙏

To see what my life looks like now, check out my IG @samminormanfit and leave a flex 💪 comment on my latest post so I know you’re from my blog fam!  💗💗